Tuesday, November 9, 2010

The Writer’s Den Dictionary of Stupid Words
(Brought to you by the Merriam -Webster Jest Division)

I love words as much as the next person, but some of them are just plain ridiculous and have no place in the English language (except in ridiculous blog posts like this one) and they also sound rather strange when uttered during casual conversation. They're also fun ... so without further ado, I give you the first edition of the Dictionary of Stupid Words (all entries are listed non-alphabetically for your inconvenience)

for•sook (-s k ), 1. To give up (something formerly held dear); renounce: forsook liquor.
2. To leave altogether; abandon: forsook Hollywood and returned to the legitimate stage.

The fear of running out of reading material

Wearing a wig.

To kiss, To come together.

Snobbish: Pretentious.

A soviet citizen denied the right to emigrate.

Depicted as a boastful coward or buffoon.

Shaped like a sword.

An attendant, a servant, or a lesser official in a royal or noble household. 

Any of various tropical American weevils of the genus Zyzzyva, often destructive to plants.

om·buds·man (mbdzmn, -bdz-, -bdz-)
1. A man who investigates complaints and mediates fair settlements, especially between aggrieved parties such as consumers or students and an institution or organization.

mammothrept - a child brought up by its grandmother; a spoiled child

footle - act foolishly, as by talking nonsense

Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis - exposure to volcanic dust. 

Absquatulate ~ To leave or abscond with something.

Bloviate ~ To speak pompously or brag

Brouhaha ~ An uproar

Callipygian ~ Having an attractive rear end or nice buns

Discombobulate ~ To confuse

Fartlek ~ An athletic training regime

Gardyloo! ~ A warning shouted before throwing water from above

Sialoquent ~ Spitting while speaking

Snollygoster ~ A person who can't be trusted

Hemidemisemiquaver ~ A musical timing of 1/64

Slangwhanger ~ A loud abusive speaker or obnoxious writer.

Fatuous ~ Unconsciously foolish.

Eructation ~ A burp, belch.

vomitory ~ a passageway leading to a tier of seats in a theater, (especially a Roman amphitheater), or a stadium.

Tittynope ~ refers to a small quantity of anything left over be it a measly morsel of gristle remaining on a dinner plate, or the dregs of draft beer left nestled behind in the bottom of a tankard at a tailgate party.

 Silly Etymological Artifacts

• There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger. 

• Have you noticed that there is neither apple nor pine in pineapple. 

• English muffins weren't invented in England. 

• French fries do not originate in France. 

• A guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig

• And there are no hogs in Hogmanay

• And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? 

• You cannot buy boots in Boots nor virgins in Virgin. You cannot buy threshers in Threshers and the Superdrug chain is a big disappointment. 

• Quicksand only works slowly 

• If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? 

• One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? 

• If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? 

• If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? 

• A pregnant goldfish is called a twit.

More Wordy Stuff

1. Barking: Thought to be named after the London suburb, home to a former asylum site; hence 'Barking mad'.

2. Binge: A bout of uncontrolled indulgence. 

3. Blighty: A word much loved by RAF types in WW2. Originally from the Hindi word "bilayati" meaning foreign. 

4. Blimey: Could be shorthand for "God, blind me."

5. Chum: A "chummy" used to be a chimney sweep’s assistant. 

6. Cuppa: First used for tea by PG Wodehouse, the playwright. 

7. Dear: From an old English word, "deore", meaning "much loved." 

8. Grotty: Sixties Liverpool slang. 

9. Jolly: From an old French word meaning "festive". 

10. Slag: Derived from a 16th century German word meaning "dross".

 More Stupid Words, for your reading pleasure

A group of twelve or more cows

According to Merriam-Webster, "a gliding monosyllabic speech sound".

Pronounced "awk si put", it's a word for the back of the skull

A disagreeable smell.

So evident it can't be doubted.

Another word for "staginess" or "melodrama".

Partnership; comradeship.

To move a short distance. In a sentence, "The inchworm scootched across the branch."

To make a big deal out of something of little importance. Also means to add flashy or excessive decoration.

When you start partying on Friday and it lasts well into lunchtime on Saturday.

Adjective used to describe something neither overwhelming nor underwhelming. In other words, something that's just right.

To kill a cow.

A morsel left after a meal.

To be in a good mood and the opposite of disgruntled.

More earth-shattering literature to come: stay tuned!


  1. I think sardoodledom is my favorite. I shall accuse my daughter of such behavior when she gets all dramatic over her homework.
    Edge of Your Seat Romance

  2. My favorite has to be Slangwhanger, because it describes me so well!

  3. I don't know whether to be proud or ashamed at how many of these I actually use.

    I'm so glad that you have "persnickety" on here. I've never cared for it & have always had difficulty saying it without pinching my face up & saying it through my nose.

    Right, then... break's over. It's back to the slangwhanging with me.

  4. Abibliophobia? I didn't even know I had it. Thanks for the diagnosis doc.


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